有时会让我寸步难移。
生气又没足够理由，
插嘴又没礼貌。
整天被无视。
很想包容，
可是，
到头来就是问自己，
何必呢？
太为他人着想，
换来的是他人的得寸进尺。
不这么做，
我会发现，
这已经是我的习惯了。
曾以为我像是个机械人，
没感情，
没思想，
没自己想法，
所有的东西，
都是那么多年透过外界的讯息，
通过记忆体存档了，
然后由记忆体告诉我，
怎样做一个人类。
可是，
长期被无视时我才知道，
我会愤怒，
我会无奈，
我会生气。
知道吗？
有时真的很想很想问，
在你们眼中我到底是什么人？
每次要回山打根了，
都会发现有人原来不想呆在山打根。
明白那感觉吗？
我很期待回山打根见到大家,
可是有人就想要赶快离开山打根，
因为山打根很闷，
回去读书的地方会有比较多乐趣。
个人觉得，
因为羁绊不够深，
所以啰……
还是那句，
显。
闲人甲，
可有可无。
***
后记：
情绪平复了，
以我以往的习惯，
平复了就不再选择去 post，
不过这次选择这么做，
因为突然想起最近看到的一句话，
“这些是你的感觉，你不应该删除掉”
所以，
呵~
Sunday, October 30, 2011
Connection
The connections are getting diminished...
From time to time...
At least,
the bonds are still there,
I hope.
Less than 5 days
I'll be back
Time to reconnect.
From time to time...
At least,
the bonds are still there,
I hope.
Less than 5 days
I'll be back
Time to reconnect.
Like?
When saw an epic comment,
I can see many people like......
I will like it,
as if it's funny or it's really good.
Sometimes,
just couldn't be bothered,
maybe I'm just abnormal,
don't think that's nice or funny at all...
Somehow,
it is just an offense,
or to discriminate,
or to show off and blah blah.
Just epic fail la.
Somehow I wondered,
why do I have to force myself to think like you?
Tired of complaining,
complaints about how life should be.
"Said is easier than done",
this is the most discouraging phrase I ever heard.
This is not a reason,
but excuse.
Don't know what I'm saying?
Neither do I.
I can see many people like......
I will like it,
as if it's funny or it's really good.
Sometimes,
just couldn't be bothered,
maybe I'm just abnormal,
don't think that's nice or funny at all...
Somehow,
it is just an offense,
or to discriminate,
or to show off and blah blah.
Just epic fail la.
Somehow I wondered,
why do I have to force myself to think like you?
Tired of complaining,
complaints about how life should be.
"Said is easier than done",
this is the most discouraging phrase I ever heard.
This is not a reason,
but excuse.
Don't know what I'm saying?
Neither do I.
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Friday, October 21, 2011
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Gosh...
Have already wasted 1k+ at flights for myself for this summer break...........
If I get the allowance,
then it will be better,
I eventually save more money than I didn't go for the research...
But
if I didn't manage to get my allowance successfully,
my 1k+ expenses will be my net loss............ T.T
(if you guys didn't know, actually the allowance will only gave to the chosen people who have great cv or resume, which I'm not known at 1st)
Although I'm not the one who paying,
still feel sorry to my dad (who pay for my flight) since I insist for it at the 1st place...
He won't have to pay 400+ more if I don't go for the research program...
Have already submit the form for the application of research program...
And already book for the ticket...
If didn't get the allowance,
I really pay only for the experience....
Lastly,
anyone who read this,
please wish me luck.. >.<
If I get the allowance,
then it will be better,
I eventually save more money than I didn't go for the research...
But
if I didn't manage to get my allowance successfully,
my 1k+ expenses will be my net loss............ T.T
(if you guys didn't know, actually the allowance will only gave to the chosen people who have great cv or resume, which I'm not known at 1st)
Although I'm not the one who paying,
still feel sorry to my dad (who pay for my flight) since I insist for it at the 1st place...
He won't have to pay 400+ more if I don't go for the research program...
Have already submit the form for the application of research program...
And already book for the ticket...
If didn't get the allowance,
I really pay only for the experience....
Lastly,
anyone who read this,
please wish me luck.. >.<
Recently
Recently,
seldom stay at home.
Recently,
often fool around at friends' house,
although finals is near.
Recently,
always sleep after 3....
For no reason...
Recently,
no mood to study,
because subjects for this sem more with memorizing...
Must study ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh................................
Recently,
use a lot of money,
because often go out eat nice meal and tea break...
Recently,
addict to Dota again...
Although it's a waste of time...
Recently,
often get involved with pervertic topics more than before...
Since getting more perverted friends... ==
Last but not least
Recently...
Addict with COW and CHICKEN's theme song....
For teasing purpose...
Inside joke btw... LAWL~
seldom stay at home.
Recently,
often fool around at friends' house,
although finals is near.
Recently,
always sleep after 3....
For no reason...
Recently,
no mood to study,
because subjects for this sem more with memorizing...
Must study ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh................................
Recently,
use a lot of money,
because often go out eat nice meal and tea break...
Recently,
addict to Dota again...
Although it's a waste of time...
Recently,
often get involved with pervertic topics more than before...
Since getting more perverted friends... ==
Last but not least
Recently...
Addict with COW and CHICKEN's theme song....
For teasing purpose...
Inside joke btw... LAWL~
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Late night
Again,
till now still haven't sleep...
not doing any work,
still staying at there doing nothing...
No mood ah...
8 days later finals dy.................
Do anything also no mood...
Not going for frisbee recently,
is it because I lazy?
Or already don't have the interest anymore?
Room very messy,
again,
no mood to tidy up...
LOL...
Need somebody to help me get rid the lazy bum-ness of me~
Got who willing to help me?? XD
*Just kidding~ Skeep luh~
till now still haven't sleep...
not doing any work,
still staying at there doing nothing...
No mood ah...
8 days later finals dy.................
Do anything also no mood...
Not going for frisbee recently,
is it because I lazy?
Or already don't have the interest anymore?
Room very messy,
again,
no mood to tidy up...
LOL...
Need somebody to help me get rid the lazy bum-ness of me~
Got who willing to help me?? XD
*Just kidding~ Skeep luh~
Saturday, October 15, 2011
Faith
Not to lose faith to the people, things around me.
Not to lose faith on myself.
Faith,
is the reason why I have to move on.
突然又看回去年的post，
看见有个关于“女主角”的留言，
顿时迥了……
现在，
如当时的post所说，
进了student council，
有点希望如有人所言，
有个编剧的能安排个“女主角”跟我拍出这一场戏。
哈哈，
或许，
真的要去相信会有这机遇吧…… :)
Not to lose faith on myself.
Faith,
is the reason why I have to move on.
突然又看回去年的post，
看见有个关于“女主角”的留言，
顿时迥了……
现在，
如当时的post所说，
进了student council，
有点希望如有人所言，
有个编剧的能安排个“女主角”跟我拍出这一场戏。
哈哈，
或许，
真的要去相信会有这机遇吧…… :)
Again and again
Procrastinating,
again and again...
Everything keep delaying,
work,
progress,
plan,
studies.........
Stay at friend's house on last few nights,
partly is because had 2 papers this week,
also find excuses to PLAY CARDS (BIG 2) AND DOTA(?) with the gang...
It's been awhile since I last played dota,
the game which got the most anti's from girls because this keep their boyfriend away..
Not entirely true though.. :S
Btw,
suddenly have a plan to find the right person before prom night next year,
but so far don't really have a particular target in Curtin,
due to delay again and again ("ng deh ng dew" or "lai lai han" in Cantonese) for the searching process... :S :S
Sometimes,
just feel lazy,
again and again,
so,
just wait for the right time then...........
"Kick",
where are you?
"Kick"!
I need you!!
Come on,
"kick"!! "kick"!!
again and again...
Everything keep delaying,
work,
progress,
plan,
studies.........
Stay at friend's house on last few nights,
partly is because had 2 papers this week,
also find excuses to PLAY CARDS (BIG 2) AND DOTA(?) with the gang...
It's been awhile since I last played dota,the game which got the most anti's from girls because this keep their boyfriend away..
Not entirely true though.. :S
Btw,
suddenly have a plan to find the right person before prom night next year,
but so far don't really have a particular target in Curtin,
due to delay again and again ("ng deh ng dew" or "lai lai han" in Cantonese) for the searching process... :S :S
Sometimes,
just feel lazy,
again and again,
so,
just wait for the right time then...........
"Kick",
where are you?
"Kick"!
I need you!!
Come on,
"kick"!! "kick"!!
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
"I like you, but you don't like me"
Haiz,
still keep saying this kind of things,
not sien de meh....
You haven't sien,
I sien already...
LOLzzzz....
still keep saying this kind of things,
not sien de meh....
You haven't sien,
I sien already...
LOLzzzz....
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
为什么对她酱好？
曾经被人问过，
为何还对她酱好？
若已经没意思了，
当晚就不会千里迢迢，
特地去IJM载她然后又绕回去Grandview。
其实，
别想太多，
只是不想对她有意思时才对她好，
然后没意思了就睬她都傻。
我不想，
做人做到酱现实~~~ =o=
***
其实也没什么特别原因，
只是突然想起这回事，
然后又想起我当时回答不了这问题。
那么，
就让我在这儿写下我现在想到的答案吧~
喜欢炒作的人，
就继续炒作吧，
反正，
也没人介意了吧？ :D
为何还对她酱好？
若已经没意思了，
当晚就不会千里迢迢，
特地去IJM载她然后又绕回去Grandview。
其实，
别想太多，
只是不想对她有意思时才对她好，
然后没意思了就睬她都傻。
我不想，
做人做到酱现实~~~ =o=
***
其实也没什么特别原因，
只是突然想起这回事，
然后又想起我当时回答不了这问题。
那么，
就让我在这儿写下我现在想到的答案吧~
喜欢炒作的人，
就继续炒作吧，
反正，
也没人介意了吧？ :D
Saturday, October 8, 2011
So...
3rd - 14th Nov: Sandakan (MOULD)
15th - 21st Nov: Perth (VACATION :D :D)
22nd-27thNov (or 4th Dec): Sandakan (Sweep the MOULD)
27th Nov (or 4th Dec) - 19th Dec: Miri (part time research + some Ultimate?)
20th Dec - 1st Jan: Sandakan (x'mas and new year's eve :D)
2nd - 18th Jan: Miri (Malaysian + Moral Studies and continue part time research + Ultimate tournament)
19th - 29th Jan: Sandakan (CNY, hotel gathering again before that?)
30th Jan onwards: Miri until June (Finish MM Studies, part time research and start 3rd year sem 1 D: D: )
Haven't decide to come back on 27th Nov or 4th Dec...
Depends on how long my mentor prefer me stay...
Of course, I will prefer 4th Dec.. :D
15th - 21st Nov: Perth (VACATION :D :D)
22nd-27thNov (or 4th Dec): Sandakan (Sweep the MOULD)
27th Nov (or 4th Dec) - 19th Dec: Miri (part time research + some Ultimate?)
20th Dec - 1st Jan: Sandakan (x'mas and new year's eve :D)
2nd - 18th Jan: Miri (Malaysian + Moral Studies and continue part time research + Ultimate tournament)
19th - 29th Jan: Sandakan (CNY, hotel gathering again before that?)
30th Jan onwards: Miri until June (Finish MM Studies, part time research and start 3rd year sem 1 D: D: )
Haven't decide to come back on 27th Nov or 4th Dec...
Depends on how long my mentor prefer me stay...
Of course, I will prefer 4th Dec.. :D
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Dilemma
Going to have an opportunity...
A research related to computational fluid dynamics during my coming summer holiday...
Allowance RM1000+ for 3 months...
Sounds not bad,
but
A research related to computational fluid dynamics during my coming summer holiday...
Allowance RM1000+ for 3 months...
Sounds not bad,
but
Need to go back Miri on Dec instead of Jan next year
If don't do so, then I must be very pro at it that I don't need close monitoring from my mentor for data analysis...
"Salabread" Christmas as well as new year's day in Miri with no one...
Most importantly, NO ENTERTAINMENT
If don't do so, then I must be very pro at it that I don't need close monitoring from my mentor for data analysis...
"Salabread" Christmas as well as new year's day in Miri with no one...
Most importantly, NO ENTERTAINMENT
I'm not like someone who are very determined ("This is the chance in once a blue moon, I will definitely choose to spend my time there!!"),
at least I prefer to spend my Christmas and New Year's eve in Sandakan... :/
The mentor told me that he will have a lecture about CFD tml morning,
that's a 3rd year lecture,
but I'm welcomed for it...
See how things go by then.. :/
at least I prefer to spend my Christmas and New Year's eve in Sandakan... :/
The mentor told me that he will have a lecture about CFD tml morning,
that's a 3rd year lecture,
but I'm welcomed for it...
See how things go by then.. :/
Monday, October 3, 2011
Hard to imagine
Hard to imagine,
when complications attack you all the sudden...
I can appear so happily in facebook,
while blogging the negative side of myself...
Sometimes just felt helpless,
just reluctant to find someone to talk with...
Sick of the versatility of myself..
Perhaps,
time is the solution to help me gone through all these odds...
Get me out of here............
when complications attack you all the sudden...
I can appear so happily in facebook,
while blogging the negative side of myself...
Sometimes just felt helpless,
just reluctant to find someone to talk with...
Sick of the versatility of myself..
Perhaps,
time is the solution to help me gone through all these odds...
Get me out of here............
Sunday, October 2, 2011
Saturday, October 1, 2011
Lol
A bit drunk,
took 8 shots of cola + whiskey..
But still can walk,
recognize who are the people,
can blog...
Wants to vomit,
but still not until the level that I will vomit.....
And found something amazing,
I didn't simply say something,
didn't do something stupid,
and didn't think of you when the alcohol is on my mind.
How amazing <3
The bad thing is,
probably will have a headache tml...
Hopefully not that serious... >.<
took 8 shots of cola + whiskey..
But still can walk,
recognize who are the people,
can blog...
Wants to vomit,
but still not until the level that I will vomit.....
And found something amazing,
I didn't simply say something,
didn't do something stupid,
and didn't think of you when the alcohol is on my mind.
How amazing <3
The bad thing is,
probably will have a headache tml...
Hopefully not that serious... >.<
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